Sunday, August 5, 2007

Are you really incompatible?

In today's global culture people have differences of opinion. Whether the topic is marriage, travel,politics, work, religion or even what type of car is the most reliable, different people feel differently but what about when you and your guy can't agree? Does it mean you're incompatible? For the most part, the answer is no.

What we tend to forget in our quest for the fairytale relationship, is that no one person can be all things to another. It just won't happen. So while you may have a certain way you like to spend your Saturday nights (hitting the latest hot spot for dinner or dancing) and your partner may have another idea of how to pass the evening (in front of the TV watching desperate housewives), there's no reason you can't still find fulfillment in each other. The key is, remembering to find it elsewhere, too!

The only area where differences of opinion definitely spell trouble is within the relationship itself. The lines of communication must always be open, even if it's uncomfortable, and this means in every aspect, but most importantly regarding your level of commitment. Sometimes it's better to make plans together in advance so both people can agree to what will they be doing together. It's a unity factor. Sometimes one has to give in to the other to make the relationship work but it has to be both side that give and take. Don't always make plans without involving the other or discussing if he/she wants to do this or go there.

Also, if one of you thinks it's serious while the other is still playing the field, things are bound to break down. If one of you wants to share everything and the other keeps everything secret, the chances of connecting are cut considerably. If either or both of you are disrespectful of or cruel to each other on a regular basis to the point where either of you is hurting, think about how you want to be treated and try to take a step back. Sit down and review plans of the communication between each other.

You must agree on honesty, kindness and respect. Your relationship won't work and you certainly won't be compatible if you don't tackle these issues. However, if you respect each other, maintain an open and honest rapport and are equally committed, anything is possible. Accepting that your partner has their own mindset, opinion and thoughts on whatever subject makes the relationship flow with intellectual stimulus that can be a major turn on as well.

Bar advice. Everybody has an opinion about most things. If adding your two cents worth helps your relationship by all means open your mouth. If not....

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