Showing posts with label communication gap. Show all posts
Showing posts with label communication gap. Show all posts

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Parenting your teenager

Does this sound familiar? "What ever happened to that sweet little kid we used to have a few years ago?" Teens can be difficult, and this should not be surprising, considering all the changes during adolescence that they go through. You will need to up the ante on your patience to be able to cope with them.

Even though you were once a teenager, and may have been difficult to your parents, it still takes a lot of effort to understand what your teen is going through. It will be your responsibility to bridge the communication gap between you and your child.

This is not always easy, and you will have to do your best during two crucial periods in your child's life. Adolescence and young adulthood. Your children will need all the guidance and understanding you can provide. Communication and understanding, during these sometimes trying times, may very well set the tone for the life decisions your child will make.

Here are a few tips that should help with teen parenting bonding issues:

1. Learn What Your Teen Enjoys
When your teen was a child, finding things to do was a snap. But, as they grow into their teens, you will have to work extra hard to learn about what your teens like. It may not be easy, but being able to relate to your teens likes and dislikes is integral to building an open and meaningful relationship with your child.

Remember, to be a good parent, you also have to be a good friend.

2. Being Strict Is Not A Bad Thing
Most teenagers bristle at rules and restrictions. They feel that they are old enough to take care of themselves. The invincible syndrome. While this is partially true, teens still have a need for restrictions. With new found freedoms, and desires; they could very well hurt themselves if they do not restrain themselves responsibly. Make your teen understand that he or she will be given greater freedom, but with greater freedom they must develop greater responsibility, and accountability. Freedom without responsibility is useless.

Make sure you help your teen learn to plan ahead. You do not have to plan it for them; just help guide them to make good decisions on their own.

3. Communicate Daily
Daily communication is important in keeping the channels of concern open. You teen will be more inclined to confide in you if you engage in daily conversation. Confiding in someone takes some practice and some trust. This can only be build by meaningful relationships that are facilitated by good communication. Learning to understand the world your teen lives in will put you in a better position to not only gain their trust, but to have a greater understanding of their overall behavior.

Daily communication will show your teen that you care for them. This is a very important teen parenting factor, since teens will feel more comfortable with parents that are actively involved with them. In the absence of parental involvement, teens may turn to unreliable peers when looking for guidance, or comfort. It is very important for a teens parents to provide the guidance and caring they require.

Another important thing that you can do is to get your teen to bring his or her friends home. Get to know them and be a second parent to the friends but not meddling and looking over their shoulders all the time. This way you know who they are and what is going on in your kids life and who he or she mixes with. Girls and boys will have different needs and need different approaches.

Bar advice. By the time he or she grows into a young adult and may be off to college or university, you would at least have a relationship with them and hopefully , even with new found freedom, the values, love and self pride and dignity makes them better people in society. At the same time it puts your mind at ease as well.